Ausleig (Cactus) she/ her. na. ddr player. counter strike esports enthusiast.

27/10/25

• changed aotw amount from 3 to 2 for layout purposes
• complete layout overhaul (under construction still)
• new cursor effect! hehe
• re-added stamps and blinkies from previous layout!

hi guys! as if anyone is actually reading this irw i recently came back from texas! i went to see the counter strike major in austin texas and i had so much fun! i met so many amazing people from the cs community and took some photos! im the type to live in the moment and not take a million photos but yea! now it was very conflicting.. seeing as i had wanted both team spirit and team vitality to win sadly only one was able to spoiler!! team vitality won but all was good! i got to see some new things, travel around like its no ones business and overall had the most fun imaginable :)

long time no see! nothing really new has gone on to be honest, of course being the person i am i have made some new friends!! they are all unique in their own way and the most fun to talk to! i've always been in the mindset of having diverse friend groups, it's great to have friends that are similar to you, differnt than you in a good way! ones you share the same interests with and ones that you discover some new things from!! believe me, i always have seen myself as the type to not make many friends but i seem to make at least one that sticks anyways!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!! did we all get the gifts we asked for? did we end up with one too many pairs of socks that our family members threw into the gift bag last minute? did our families end up arguing like they do every year? i wonder. i hope everyone has a great christmas, regardless of the gifts you got or the ones you didn't get. the new year is coming in quick! what are some good memories you can look back on from this year? i like to look back on metting my favorite actor back in april, or the fact i went and met the loml back in october! some games released this year or some had some pretty fun updates! im hoping next year to update more, stream more, make more friends and be happy! i hope everyone has an amazing christmas!!

its been a while! some stuff has been going on- not so much good aside from my birthday passing on the 25th of november. i dont feel any different as i have for the last few years. maybe its becuase i forced myself to grow up more in a sense. ive noticed a pattern in myself since maybe a week before my birthday, anxious, paranoid, overthinking. im not exactly sure why i feel this way, it could be the fact that i literally only work and come home like i have been since around april what a snooze fest i means seriously. but i must say, ive found new dreams for myself over the last few months! ive decided going back to school may be whats best for me, start the career life? i really do hope i stay happy, no matter what happens its all i want. i feel so loved by those around me but the way i see myself it makes it hard to believe it. why must i constantly feel self hate? i think i know why, but i cant be too sure.

recently came back from a pretty nice vacation! i mean really, i had my best friend with me and even met a long time online friend of mine! meeting them was a fun time as well i met their pet sanke, xona shes adorable and for once i truly felt i had a place, i had fun and was beyond happy. i wish i could relive the trip over and over again, it really meant the world to have the opportunity and experience i had. not to mention, the scenery was super pretty. i really miss being able to just have fun, now im back at home, alone and bored all the time. and have to pick up the slack at home again cuz who the hell else is gonna do it

my stamps! my blinkies! ddr scores new liked media!

listened to some new music recently; haven't played cs in who knows how long.. oops

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